It seems like...
Nov. 12th, 2022 04:05 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
chicatingnothing I do is really moving forward, even this photo is slightly old, but it's fresher than 15 years ago!
Sometimes I feel like I'm just doing the same stuff over Including answering back an old friend on FB who contacts me every few years just to brag.
(And maybe she is doing better... I mean, she is married, even if, if he's the same guy, he looks like something best exhumed than connubial. Although I have love in my life, it's not the kind I can flaunt, which, mostly I don't care about, but society does, and I'm a chick(A chick who lives with her mama, no less) so my being engaged or something would excite extended fam far more than anything I write, etc.
And she has the graduate degree, which I think I could have if I really cared to have it--eventually.
But if I don't care enough to chase it, then why does her having one make me feel that she's rubbing my face in it?(she totally is, but why do I care?)
Well, partially because she didn't used to close anything, and when we used to hang out, my rep was "smart, but kind of a bitch"
Also, she's so much better at being the Inspiring Crip(maybe it's the big brown eyes) and getting people on her side praising her determination and and all that.
Sometimes I feel like I'm just doing the same stuff over Including answering back an old friend on FB who contacts me every few years just to brag.
(And maybe she is doing better... I mean, she is married, even if, if he's the same guy, he looks like something best exhumed than connubial. Although I have love in my life, it's not the kind I can flaunt, which, mostly I don't care about, but society does, and I'm a chick(A chick who lives with her mama, no less) so my being engaged or something would excite extended fam far more than anything I write, etc.
And she has the graduate degree, which I think I could have if I really cared to have it--eventually.
But if I don't care enough to chase it, then why does her having one make me feel that she's rubbing my face in it?(she totally is, but why do I care?)
Well, partially because she didn't used to close anything, and when we used to hang out, my rep was "smart, but kind of a bitch"
Also, she's so much better at being the Inspiring Crip(maybe it's the big brown eyes) and getting people on her side praising her determination and and all that.
Re: Thoughts
Date: 2022-12-02 09:21 pm (UTC)We all know it's a huge lie.(It's probably kind of a big lie for most people really, but I can't even fake it.) Most of the time, I'm glad about that, but maybe my life would have been easier if I'd had a box to fit in.
Actually, at one time, I was, like, deeply fond of this person...we go back to junior-high and I had a very expensive stint as her roommate in college, but she's also kind of A Lot, and she goes through a lot of phases.
During a highly moralistic Christian phase, she had many Opinions about a deep(and very doomed...speaking of things that only have changed slightly since we hung out) crush that I nursed in a very pathetic fashion.
So now I would consider that the right thing for the wrong reason, she is back on my social networking.
But I think some arms' length is wise....